SILENTLY CLEARING MIND AND HEART

Ashok Silwal

The silent and solitary times of meditation
Are most precious moments,
About around, others but especially yourself,
Your emotions, your reasonings…
Sometimes, these privileged moments
Bring you back to society, philosophy, feelings
Morality, religion, nature….
Of course you don’t always find answers,
In fact almost never….
Because meditating is seeking.

I like these times of reflection
When one question calls for another,
When you are alone with yourself
And you have to make an effort
To understand “ something”..
And it is known that the answers
Are often within you.

Lately, it always comes to my mind
How difficult it is to find unequivocal answers.
And this ambivalence in many fields
Is rather destabilizing….

The world around us and ourselves
Sometimes appear as we are:
Everything and the opposite of everything.
Starting from myself, sometimes,
I feel shy and introverted,
Sometimes I want to tell about myself
And it will turn into a waterfall!
Sometimes, I’m very confident,
Sometimes very insecure…
Wolf and lamb, lion and gazelle!
I feel mature when I converse
With people who are more educated
And have more experience than meM;
But with the same people
I can also feel childish.

And that is how meditation forces you
To see more clearly, to deepen and examine
Your thoughts and emotions.
But then it does not tell you black or white..

And so almost every question has a a double answer:
Is it better to have strong power
Or often unproductive dialogue?
Is this medicine better that that one?
Tradition sometimes does not hinder progress ?
Is it better to be strict or lenient with children?
And also more serious, grave questions:
Who created the world?
What did we come to ?
What is death?
Great doubts can sometimes cross our meditation..

Of course many factors influence it: character, education,
Circumstances, situations, the people we meet,
The work we do..

Often when you have spent some time meditating,
You are a little disappointed because you have not solve much.
But you feel good, you feel that this time with yourself
Has done you good!
And you can touch it better” with your hands”
That
There is destruction and creation,
There is multiplicity and uniqueness,
There is Good and Evil,
There is the earth and the sky,
There is the Yin and the Yang,
There is the pain and the joy…
And you could go on forever…

But this ambivalence must be
More harmony than opposition,
More peace than war,
More love than animosity.
Meditating should lead us to this .
It is a vertical movement
Like climbing a mountain.
That requires a lot of practice.
It is a way,
It is a discipline,
It is an exercise,
It is an experience.

And it is more than important
To find the time;
A time that , even if sometimes it leaves us a little lost
Or disoriented and disappointed,
Will never be fruitless,
And will help us tho clear our mind and heart.

“Meditation is to be aware of every thought and of every feeling,
Never to say it is right or wrong,
But just to watch it and move with it.”

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